reckoning with collapse

a new series on small steps to resilience

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I’ve been staring at this blank page for several minutes, with only one word written on it: collapse.

How does one even begin to start writing about this topic? It feels so daunting. A tidal wave of imposter syndrome is rising in me. What do I know about collapse? Who am I to think I have any authority to speak on this matter? And really, I don’t. I’m no expert. But I am tired of sticking my head in the sand as the world around us continues to descend into a chaotic, dumpster fire.

I want to step forward with my eyes wide open, wide awake to the collective crises we find ourselves in. It feels harder than ever with my seven-month old daughter by my side - and all the more necessary. I owe it to her to face reality, to stop pretending everything will be okay - because I truly believe it won’t - certainly not in her lifetime.

The privilege (and random luck) of living where we do in the world makes it easy to remain oblivious, and naively optimistic about the future. But if I’m going to build a deeply rooted community and make choices that offer the greatest opportunity for the future, my eyes need to be wide open. I owe it to my daughter to do everything I can to prepare to face the cascading crises and become as resilient as we can.

From the various precarious tipping points on which our current climate rests, to the rapidly destabilizing geopolitical landscape, to the massive ripple effects we can expect the incoming United States president to have, to the overcomplexity and decline of our various systems, to the massive wealth inequality, to… the list goes on. Any of these one problems might be fixable on their own. But cumulatively, they pile one on top of the next, exacerbating each other on a slippery slope to what is commonly referred to as: collapse. Ecological collapse. Political collapse. Systemic collapse. Cultural collapse. Collapse of our lives as we know them.

We are at the tipping point. For a long time, I have believed it will take many decades for us to see this deeply impact our lives (at least where I live). But more and more, I imagine those impacts will be felt far sooner. And if those of us who believe this are wrong - fantastic. But if I’m being honest, that cusp on which we rest feels like it’s getting more and more narrow.

As Sharon Astyk writes, “Instead of crises that are essentially resolved, now we are seeing an endless stream of new problems added every year that never get resolved and create greater and great drag on the system. And that's what causes collapse.”

I’m no expert in collapse, and I’m not about to pretend to be. I’m also not going to be writing in much detail about what is happening in the world around us directly here. There are plenty of incredible resources for this, of which I will offer a place to start below for those of you who are interested in doing further learning or staying up to date as events unfold.

However, I do want to write about my own experience in grappling with this.

Right now I feel like I live in two worlds. In one world, I want to make life decisions and learn practical skills that will help build resilience and prepare us for the daunting challenges to come. And in another world, I am continuing on as if nothing is happening, making plans with friends for weekend adventures away and looking forward to exploring abroad with my family this summer. The cognitive dissonance between these two realities is wild. And yet, I believe they are both valid, and I am trying to hold space for each of them (at least for as long as it makes sense to do so)… while step by step merging them closer to a state of integration.

The reality is, as much as I absolutely adore Bill’s character in The Last of Us, I’m not ever going to reach his prepper level status. Nor do I want to. That way of being - in fear and isolation - is not an approach to this I’m interested in taking. But I do want to explore ways that we can begin to prepare and be more mindful about making choices that will lead to greater resilience in the future - whatever that future holds, and on whatever timeline that unfolds.

Our long term dream is to buy a larger property, likely with family or friends, so we can grow more of our own food. And the reality is, that’s not something that will happen overnight. For a while, I have felt immobilized by this. I’ve fallen into the trap of waiting for the perfect scenario to do anything. But I need to do something now. I need to take the small steps I can reasonably take now. And I’d like to share that journey here with you.

I don’t know what I’m doing. I’m learning with you. I’ll stumble along the way. But if you want to dip your toe in this water with me, I’d love to have you join me. It can feel scary. But we’re in this together.

I’ll share what I’m learning, experimenting with, and exploring with you, in part because I don’t have a lot of other people to share this with. This can feel super lonely, so please reach out in the comments below to let me know if you’re on board and with me. Let’s do this together.

First up in this series that I’ll be beginning sometime in the next couple of weeks, I’ll be sharing a bit about the first small steps I’m taking to store food and water. Whether or not you’re on board with the whole collapse thing, this is just generally important for disaster preparedness. Again, up to this point I’ve felt daunted by waiting until I could do this perfectly in order to do anything at all. And that has stopped me completely. So instead, I’m going to start small, and break it down step by step for myself, and for you. I’m hoping that sharing here will both keep me accountable to actually doing the work, and start to build some conversation and community around all this.

I’ll be back soon with that first article. Let me know if you’ll play along with me in the comments below.

And now, if you want to dig your teeth in, here are some resources I’ve found incredibly helpful as a beginner wrapping my head around this whole collapse thing.

For an overview of collapse, what this means, and what is happening:

• This podcast episode, Collapse in a Nutshell, by Carmen Spagnola

• This Youtube video by Kory from the Breaking Down Collapse podcast (also highly recommend the first eight episodes of this podcast if you want a more thorough primer)

• This book serialization on by

  Sarah Wilson
  on her Substack
  This is Precious

• This podcast episode by

  Sarah Wilson
  with guest Meg Wheatley

For ongoing updates on world events relevant to collapse:

• Live Like the World is Dying podcast offers monthly round-ups as well as ongoing skills, tools and other resources for preparedness

• Kory from Breaking Down Collapse offers weekly updates looking at key articles and news events over on their Patreon

• Sharon Astyk shares various resources on her Ko-fi account here and daily updates over on her Facebook page (this can be a lot to wade through, but she also writes super valuable summaries now and then). I’ll also be attending some of her upcoming workshops.

Feeling overwhelmed? Titration. Titration. Titration. I just took a break writing this to watch a little bit of a Selling the City episode (talk about cognitive dissonance). I can be a reality TV girlie and contemplate collapse, and so can you!